Football

As the month of October draws to a close, breast cancer awareness month has given us lots of hot pink on football fields, including receiver gloves, socks, and huge pairs of hot pink cleats.  Football season is a favorite time of year at our house, especially for Scott, who has never worn hot pink.....yet.  So, in this blog, I’ll first give an update on our mountain climb (fighting this breast cancer for those just joining in), and then delve into some football moments.  So, you can skip ahead, or sign out when you're ready. 

I am SOOOO excited to say that I only have one more chemo treatment!  Four doses of adriamycin cytoxan given every 3 weeks, CHECK; 12 doses of Taxol given weekly, 11 of 12, CHECK.   This coming Monday, two days before Halloween, will be my final dose of chemo!!!  These past almost 6 months will soon be behind us.  It has been a memorable journey, I’ve learned an incredible amount of things, and I am thankful for the opportunity.  I am also really excited to leave it behind and move on through the rest of this breast cancer adventure! 

So, the last two weeks have been much better than the 4 weeks preceding them.   The reduced dose was just what was needed to get me through this last bit.  My blood counts have been the best I’ve had since starting chemo.  I still need to be careful of germs, but can come out of isolation, which I had sort of put my self into for a few weeks when my counts were so low.  I have this theory, that is probably not medically correct, but I at least justify that outside germs and crowds are much safer than inside germs and crowds, since the germs can dissipate into the atmosphere.  More about that below (I went to a college football game!).  Frequent hand washing, I am told, is one of the most important things necessary to avoid germs and illness.   The fatigue is less debilitating.  I still have rest times (reclining, but not sleeping, just enjoying computer work on a lap top and reading—which I’ve loved!), but I’m up and doing things for equal or more amounts of time.  The neuropathy (tingling and numbness of fingers & toes due to nerves affected by Taxol) is still present, but has only increased slightly.  My fingernails and toenails feel bruised.  They could fall off, but hopefully since I’m so close to the end, they can hold on.   My hair continues growing.  I will post some pictures of the process. 

Oct.15th Hair

September 25th 

On Friday we met with the Surgeon, Dr. Robert Goulet, who is NOT an actor and singer, at least to my knowledge.  I’m scheduled for surgery as planned, Monday, Nov. 19^th.  They will do a lumpectomy (remove the now shrunken tumor, the tissue in the area before it shrunk, plus a bit more to get clear margins), and remove auxiliary lymph nodes in two areas in my left arm pit.  Sounds like the lymph node area is the most involved part of the surgery due to nerves in that area, and that portion of the surgery is also the more difficult part to recover from.  I’ll have some type of drain attached in that area for 7-10 days (which sounds gross, but I guess it’s small and not noticeable).  The actual surgery takes about two hours, but they will do a couple of preparatory procedures earlier that morning (ultrasound to place a guided needle and installing a pain blocker for recovery).  They will keep me over night, and then I’ll be home by noon the following day.  My mom is coming in town the Wednesday before surgery, so we can have some pre-surgery time together.  She will stay for 3 weeks.  My baby Sister Krista will join us from DC for Thanksgiving, as well as Garrett from Mississippi.

Three to Four weeks after surgery, I’ll begin radiation, which is 5 days a week for 6 weeks.  Unlike chemo, which took 4-5 hours every time, radiation is less than 30 minutes.  By early February, I’ll be finished with everything.  From that point, I’ll take a hormone blocker drug (since my cancer feeds off 2 hormones) for 5-10 years and have checkups every 6 months (at least that’s my understanding at this point). 

Snuggled up with the blanket my friend Kami made for chemo days.   I should have sat up--the wig is doing a beehive thing against the pillow.

Sorry that took so long.  I want to thank everyone for their support and kindness through all of this.  My church family has spoiled us with dinners every Monday and Wednesday, which have pretty much fed us for the entire week.  I’ve received so many kind and encouraging texts, FB (facebook) messages, emails, notes, fun hat/wig pictures, fun random things in the mail, wonderful advice, and lots of prayers in my family’s behalf.  Garrett was my chemo partner on Monday.  He posted a picture on his FB page yesterday, and it was soon filled with such loving and encouraging comments and over a hundred "likes."  I have felt such a huge out-pouring of love and support through this entire journey.  It has made a huge difference.  I have never felt alone, and have never been alone.  Thank you from the bottom of my heart for your love and support.  It has been amazing and so uplifting!  I know we’re not finished, but it is wonderful to have what I hear is the most difficult part behind us.  Yeah team!!!  Thank you!!!

So, on to football!  Garrett and Scott purchased tickets months ago for the BYU/Notre Dame Game held last weekend.  They only purchased 2 tickets, because we doubted I’d be able to attend at the last of my chemo days.  Days before, Scott was offered 2 more tickets.  With Garrett in town, that provided an opportunity to spend 5 hours in the car with family!  I didn’t want to miss out, plus the game would be outside germs that would “dissipate into the atmosphere,” making it a safer place than a smaller indoor crowd.  So, Courtney and I joined them for the game.   It was so fun being part of that memory.  We met up with the Baers, at the tail end of their tailgating, who were in from Utah, saw a few other surprise friends in the stadium, and met up with Aubrey at the end of the game.  It was a really exciting game.  BYU led 14-7 at half time, but the final score ended with Notre Dame on top, 17-14.  I was sooo tired after the game and curled up in the back seat resting all of the way home.

Manti Te'o, Notre Dame’s only Mormon team member, was fun to watch, and he had a great game.  He has an amazing story.  Click on his name for an article written this week in an Oklahoma Newspaper.  Since BYU lost, I hope Notre Dame can continue the season undefeated.    

Courtney & Garrett in front of the famous "Touch down Jesus" mural.

My Utah neighbor, Lori.

Cosmo and a sold out crowd of dissipating germs.                      

Score board at half time.  Sadly, BYU did not score again, and Notre Dame added 10 more.

Aubrey & Garrett share birthdays, 2 years apart.  We've known
her since birth.  Her Mom and I worked together at BYU
 and we've stayed close friends ever since.

If you can’t get enough of football, here’s another story I enjoyed:  Same Jersey.  I’m thankful to wear the same jersey as all of you.  We are all on God’s team, brothers and sisters in this wonderful world, with a Heavenly Father that loves us and watches over us.  He wants us to look out for each other, so we are all together one day at the REAL Super Bowl in heaven.   

Dragon

Last week, I decided my next blog post needed the title of Dragon….drag’n….dragging, which is how I’ve been feeling over the past two weeks.  The compounding effect of the weekly chemo treatments has left me with a pretty heavy dose of fatigue.  I’ve also had  some increased side effects—neuropathy is what they call it.  The nerve endings on my fingers and toes get a numbness that has increased over the past few weeks.  My lab work levels have been too low each week, but within range to continue treatment. 

So, to combat the side effects, decrease the fatigue, and improve my blood counts, this past Monday they reduced my dose by 20%.  They said that many have to have their dose reduced after the 3^rd or 4^th treatment, so the fact that I’ve made it through 8 doses without a reduction is great.  The final 4 treatments at 20% less will still give me plenty of the chemo, and reduce the risk of permanent damage from the side effects.  I’m really pleased with this change, and have felt better already.  This Tuesday and Wednesday have been much better than the previous 2 weeks.  I only have 3 chemo doses remaining, so in 3 ½ weeks, my body can start rebuilding its strength.  For the past 2-3 weeks, I’ve only been able to jog for ½ mile, and then walk 2 miles.  Then the majority of the day has been spent lounging, working on a laptop or reading.  The fatigue has been extremely heavy.  But this week I’m able to run a mile, and then walk 2 miles, which is really exciting!  The exercise has been key in keeping my spirits positive. 

Since my immune system is compromised, I need to be extra careful during these final 3 ½ weeks.  There are a lot of illnesses going around, so I’m trying to avoid large crowds, which isn’t fun.  I’ve been so blessed to have had almost 6 months of chemo and not come down with any illnesses.   

After the chemo, I’ll have 3 weeks off, and then surgery that is planned for the Monday before Thanksgiving.  Three to four weeks after that I’ll begin 6 weeks of radiation, 5 days a week.  So by early February, I will be finished!! 

This past weekend was General Conference for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.  It happens twice a year, on the first Saturday and Sunday of October and April.  We leave the entire weekend open to spend time as a family watching the world-wide broadcast.  There are 2 sessions each day.  We have a big country breakfast/brunch on Sunday morning, with biscuits, gravy, scrambled eggs, and fruit.  I really enjoyed listening this past weekend and so many of the messages had helpful advice.  President Deiter Uchtdorf talked about finding joy in every day, and not focusing on the ending.  “We shouldn’t wait to be happy until we reach some future point, only to discover that happiness was already available—all the time! Life is not meant to be appreciated only in retrospect. “This is the day which the Lord hath made … ,” the Psalmist wrote. “Rejoice and be glad in it.”⁶

Brothers and sisters, no matter our circumstances, no matter our challenges or trials, there is something in each day to embrace and cherish. There is something in each day that can bring gratitude and joy if only we will see and appreciate it.

Perhaps we should be looking less with our eyes and more with our hearts. I love the quote: “One sees clearly only with the heart. Anything essential is invisible to the eyes.” Of Regrets and Resolutions

He was referring to life in general, but I’ve been guilty of that with this chemo  battle—only 3 ½ more weeks, etc…but loved the reminder to recognize the wonderful things that happen in every ordinary day.  I’m happiest when I find ways to serve others—even when I’m resting in bed, and when I reflect on the many blessings in my life, which includes so many wonderful people who have touched my life in many different ways.  

Mary Time

I’ve now had 7 of the 12 weekly chemo treatments!!  It feels great to be over the hump and on the downhill side of chemo.  The last two weeks have gone well.  The fatigue has set in stronger.  Tuesdays and Wednesdays are still my most energetic days, so I try to schedule my to-do things on those days.  I have to have some down time EVERY day now.  I’m spending more time reading and doing things on a lap top while I rest.  My peach fuzz hair continues to grow!  I’ll try to post an updated photo in each blog to show the growth. 

  

About 10 days ago I was feeling frustrated and down about my lack of energy, looking ahead and knowing it was going to continue declining.  A wise friend shared something that was really helpful.  She referred to the story in the New Testament of sisters Mary and Martha, Luke 10:38-42.  As a quick refresher, the Savior was in their home and Martha was getting annoyed with Mary because they had a lot of work to do, and Mary was sitting at Jesus’ feet, learning from him.  Martha, in frustration, complained to Jesus about Mary not helping her.  He then tells her:  "But one thing is needful:  and Mary hath chosen that good part, which shall not be taken away from her."  So, my friend’s counsel was, this is a time in your life to take on the Mary role, Martha will return, but enjoy this rare season that you can embrace some Mary time.  I know the Savior wants us all to find the right balance of being both a Mary and a Martha.  I’m trying to appreciate  and enjoy this Mary time, rather than sorrow over the Martha time that has to  check out for a while. I’m  using my rest time to research  my family tree, read , and write in my journal.  I love being able to do these things without feeling guilty about neglecting other things.   

   

As I was reading scriptures last week, I came across a verse that really stood out, and provided comfort.  King Benjamin is speaking to his people, prophesying of Christ.  In Moroni 3:7, of the Book of Mormon it says:  And lo, he shall suffer temptations, and pain of body, hunger, thirst, and FATIGUE, even more than man can suffer, except it be unto death; for behold, blood cometh from every pore, so great shall be his anguish for the wickedness and abominations of his people.”  The word “fatigue” reminded me that He really has experienced every challenge that we will face, and because of that, he knows how we feel and how to help us through any challenge.  I am so thankful for Jesus and the strength and support I feel from Him during this mountain climb.  I’m also very thankful for all of the prayers that are continually going up in my behalf.  They are so helpful-- I feel their sustaining power.      

Chemo Brain

I love seeing all of the Halloween decorations in stores now, knowing that when Halloween arrives, my chemo days are over with!  The sad news, I won’t be able to dress up as Avatar the Last Air Bender, because I am now getting peach fuzz on my scalp!  Yes, hair is starting to grow back.  It’s fun, like watching a garden, each morning an increase in hair fuzz.  I can’t tell what color or texture it will be yet, but they say it usually comes in really curly, and then goes back to your original texture within 2 years. 

It’s nice that I’m growing some scalp hair, because I’ve lost all of my eyelashes and most of my eyebrows.  I tried putting on some fake eyelashes, which was a joke, since they stayed in a straight line.  I considered splurging for eyelash extensions, but then realized there was nothing to extend on to.  The doctor said it wasn’t a good idea to have fake ones put on, putting myself at risk for an infection.  I considered drawing in some eyebrows, but worry that I might look like an Angry Bird, have the wrong facial expressions, or be asymmetrical.  So, I wear heavy eye liner (probably rather gothic looking) to give some contrast to help my eyes show up.  I don’t have to use any mascara or worry about looking like Tammy Faye Baker with mascara running down my cheeks when I’m watching something touching that makes me cry.  So, life is good.  Another exciting thing is I’ve lost 7 pounds through this whole process, which was once 10 pounds-- the 10 I’ve gradually gained over the past 10 years and have wanted to lose, but now it’s down to only 7 thanks to the steroids I get every Monday with my chemo, which gives me a boost of energy and appetite for days 2 and 3 of each week.  I’m now using more self-restraint on those days. 

So, I’ve now had 5 of the 12 Taxol chemo doses.  I’m almost half way there!  Looking backwards, the weeks that have passed seemed to have flown.  Looking ahead, well, there’s still a lot of weeks until Valentines, so it’s easiest to take the looking ahead part one day at a time.   The compounding effect of the weekly doses is definitely being felt.  Tuesdays and Wednesdays are my best days energy wise, but they aren’t like the Energizer Bunny days I experienced in the very beginning of Taxol.  Then energy seems to gradually decrease, bottoming out on Saturdays.  Thursdays I feel nauseous and take a dose of Zofran, plus I’ve learned to keep food on my stomach.  I still run 1.5 miles most days, which is not far, but it’s really helped keep my spirits high, keep my energy up, and lessened the side effects of the treatments. 

I had heard joking about “chemo brain,” but now have some evidence that it does exist, at least with me.  It’s also a good heads up/warning for anyone interacting with me, or at least a valid excuse I can use until Halloween.  Recently, I rushed the kids out the door so I’d be on time for a 6:00 p.m. meeting, and upon arriving early, realized I was actually a week early.  This past Friday, I thought it was our turn to make breakfast treats for the early morning Bible study class held at our home.  I woke up early and had hot bread cooking when the family in charge for that day walked in with breakfast.  I checked the calendar—I was a week early, again.  I mailed a Texas thank you note to a local friend’s address.  She called to share the laugh with me.   So, if anyone gets the wrong thank you note, two notes, or no notes, please blame it on chemo brain; or if I flake out on something I was supposed to do, until Halloween, please accept the chemo brain excuse. 

Sorry to have rambled for so long on myself.  I wanted to share a link to a sweet story that was heartwarming: Dayton's Legs.  I am so appreciative of my support team in stepping in and covering for the things I’m not able to cover.  When Scott was taking Heath to school, I had a wonderful chauffeur and chemo companion, another wonderful chauffeur to take Scott Jr. to and from school that same day, and we have wonderful chemo night chefs, whose masterpieces feed us for days.  Three elves dropped by and made my kitchen cabinets and appliances glisten.  I’m so thankful for the prayers, kind words, and random notes and messages.  I know I’m being watched over from above, and by His followers right beside me.    

Taxol 25% complete

Yesterday I had Taxol chemo dose 3 of the 12.  The only pain with the treatment is when they access and de-access the port.  I have a doorbell looking disk  about the diameter of a nickel that was surgically placed under my skin, just below my right collar bone.  It makes access to my veins easier.  Everyone in the room has to wear a mask during these processes, to keep things sanitary.  I use a topical ointment that is supposed to deaden it, but it still hurts as they place a rather large, deep needle into the surface of the port, using lots of pressure.  Besides that, nothing else hurts.  They take blood to the lab each time, and we have to wait an hour for those results before they can start treatment.  It's a good time to read and write.  After that, they give premeds, which soak in for 30 minutes, and then the chemo, which drips in for about 1 1/2 hours.  The part I like least is the premed Benadryl, which is new with this phase.  It's to prevent allergic reactions.  It takes affect almost immediately.  They say it makes you feel drunk.  I've never had alcohol, so never been drunk, but it's an awful feeling.  My limbs immediately feel heavy, my entire body is very tired and groggy.  It's hard to talk.  It feels like every little movement takes a great deal of effort, so I just lay there and half sleep and maybe total sleep too.  I wake up when they  come in the room and tell me what they are adding next, but that's about it.  Thankfully, I don't have to drive home or worry about anything else for the rest of the day.  I come home and sleep it off.  After about 5 hours at home, it wears off and I feel back to normal.  There's no nausea with this chemo, as long as I keep some food on my stomach.

Our church family is taking good care of us.  They started a "meal train" to spoil us with dinner every chemo Monday (mealtrain.com), which is a free online service where you can set up a meal calendar, email a group, and people sign up for a day to bring dinner.  Within 12 hours of the email, every chemo Monday was filled.  We are feeling the love and feel very thankful for their kindness.

My white blood cell counts have been too low for all of the treatments but 2, but close enough to give the treatment.  It's disappointing that the philosophy, at least with this medical network/group, seems to be pretty much limited to medication with no teaching/training about nutrition to aid my body in restoring its immune system--besides things to avoid because they might carry germs (mostly food handling precautions).  I've been reading and learning more about foods and practices that can aid in building white blood cells, so I'm hoping these might boost my immune system so I won't have to postpone treatment for any weeks or stay vulnerable to catching an illness.  (If your counts are too low for treatment, they send you home and give your body another week to build white blood cells, and if needed they can add medication to boost it.)

I missed the "before school photo" as I have for probably the past 8 first days for her, so this is what I took when she got off the bus.  Tenth grade, my baby!

These past two weeks have been much better than the Phase I chemo treatment.  They were also the strongest weeks I'll have for a while, since the weekly treatments compound over time, without much time for my body to rebuild.  On Tuesday, after my first Taxol treatment, I was scrubbing walls, baseboards, mopping (not moping), and all kinds of other neglected projects.  (There's a steroid in the chemo recipe that gives an energy boost that I can feel for Tuesday and Wednesday.  As the week progresses, I have to add in some off-my-feet times during the day.)  It was the day before school started for Courtney.  Courtney and Scott Jr. had doctor checkups that week, Heath had his wisdom teeth removed, we sanded and refinished some wood chairs, and prepared the bonus room for seminary, where an early-morning bible study class is held for high school youth every school morning at 6:00 a.m.  It is a blessing that Courtney can walk down the hall and we don't need to drive her.  We unlock the door front door, and the teachers do the rest!

The second Taxol week, I was able to take a road trip with Scott to Detroit from Tuesday morning until Thursday night, squeezing in a 29th wedding anniversary celebration along with work.  It was a nice get-away while Heath was still home to be our driver since Scott Jr. started his college classes.  While Scott was at work, I spent time with our close friends, the Holmes.  We met about 24 years ago in Dallas, when the boys were 2 and 3, and their daughter Allison was 2, with Ashley's birth soon after.  We quickly became close friends and it's been a life-long friendship.  Over the years, we have lived in the same city at the same time 5 different times, in 3 different states, and recently they've been only 4 hours away for the past 2 years, where Scott's been working a few days most weeks for the past 17 months.  So it's been fun keeping up the friendship.  

The Holmes Family, at Allison's wedding in Detroit.

The Holmes have been serving as mission presidents for our church in Detroit.  They watch over 100+ missionaries for three years.  Their 11 year-old and 14 year-old are with them.  The mission president can't leave the mission boundaries during his service, so they have had 2 daughters married in the Detroit Temple, sent a son off on a mission, and will soon meet their first grandchild that was born in July when Ashley brings him to Detroit.  They are an amazing family.  It was fun watching their lives of service.

Sweater party & Cody Cody Simpson, her latest music crush.

Friday, we celebrated Courtney's 15th birthday.  She is so much fun and such a delight. We laugh a lot.  She loves collecting vintage (some call them ugly) sweaters, and had her friends and family wear sweaters for her party (yes, in August--she cranked the AC up).  She hopes to get her learners driving permit soon.

This week, we are finishing up preparations before Heath leaves for BYU-Idaho on Friday.  He and Scott have a road trip planned to make memories along the way.  Their plans include Nauvoo, Illinois, where they will visit some church history sites, Bad Lands National Park, Mount Rushmore, and Yellow Stone National Park.  No camping, of course.  Heath moves into his apartment Thursday morning.  I'm so glad I was able to visit the campus with him in May, since chemo prevents me from joining in on this trip.  Heath will be greatly missed here at home.  I'm excited for his new adventure...there's Skype, and Christmas is just around the corner!

This year, the seminary class is studying the New Testament.  This week, they are learning about Christ's birth.  It's been fun experiencing a mini Christmas in August.  Two of my favorite people to read and think about in the events surrounding Christ's birth are Mary and Simeon.  

I love Luke 1:46-55 where Mary shares her faith and testimony.  Everywhere else, the scriptures talk about Mary watching, pondering, and keeping things in her heart.  But this is the one place where she shares her faith and knowledge of spiritual things, as a teenager.  Mary the Mother of Jesus bible story video is 4 minutes long.  It's powerful in learning more about this amazing woman.  

Simeon is another person I admire in the events surrounding Christ's birth.  He had been told by the spirit that before he died, he would see his Savior.  He was an old man, but full of faith in this promise.  He was prompted by the Holy Spirit to be at the temple on the same day that  Mary and Joseph presented Christ at the Temple.  I admire his life and preparation, that he followed the promptings of the spirit and was in the right place at the right time.  

Simeon gives us all an example of how to live so we are prepared to receive and then heed promptings so we can experience the spiritual events that God has in store of each of us in our lives.  I'm thankful for the earthly angels in my life that follow promptings of the spirit in my behalf, blessing my family through their love and kindness.   

  

Taxol & Time Usage

Today was my first chemo treatment with Taxol, which will be my new adventure for 11 more Mondays, finishing up just before Halloween.  Scott and I were very anxious about starting a new treatment, having read about some of the extreme side effects and allergic reactions.  Thankfully, it went well and with no extreme side effects so far (it has only been 8 hours since leaving the cancer center, but they said extreme reactions would have happened while the chemo was being given.)  My blood counts were again below their preferred level, but close enough to still do the chemo (sadly, the woman next to me had to go home and wait a week because her counts were too low--but this was after the pre-meds were given, so she had to sleep away the day WITHOUT getting her treatment). The nurse puts the meds in gradually with pauses to watch for allergic reactions, having all of the supplies needed in case I had a reaction.  The pre-meds included a high dose of Benadryl, which almost immediately made me very drowsy.

Taxol's side effects can vary, but most common are tingly sensations or numbness in the fingertips and toes.  If it gets to a point where I can't do buttons, I'm to let them know and they can adjust the dose.  Another common side effect is sore bones.  I can take Advil or Tylenol to help with this, as long as I take my temperature beforehand, and let it wear off for a few yours to make sure I'm not masking any fevers.

We returned home around 1:00 p.m.  I immediately went to bed and slept solid until 4:00 p.m.  My friend Cynde brought a wonderful dinner at 5:00, which was such a blessing, not needing to worry about any of that.  I have not felt nauseous yet, and have not taken any anti-nausea drugs (but the pre-meds included Zofran, which should be worn off by now, so we'll see how it goes).  I had an appetite and loved eating a healthy dinner!  With the previous phase, I would have no appetite for at least 4 days, so this is encouraging!!  I'm also excited that I'm able to be awake for a while to update this blog and accomplish a few more things.  Things are looking up!!! I'm stoked!  I've now learned that Mondays are a day to block out the calendar for nothing but chemo and sleeping.  After that, I'm hoping my week can be pretty normal, but I'll know a lot more once the chemo actually kicks in and starts doing it's work, which should start happening Wednesday or Thursday, with a cumulative effect as these 12 weeks go by.

Amazing sand sculpture made by a group from Bloomington.

On a different note, I am very thankful for the blessings the Lord has given me.  I have been able to serve in my volunteer church work, without missing any major events. This past weekend was our annual Beach Dance, held at the Midwest Sports Complex, where Tim donates use of his amazing beach volleyball courts.  Five stakes (groups of 8-10 congregations per stake) join in on this dance, including the 3 Indianapolis Stakes, Bloomington Stake, and Muncie Stake, with some groups traveling more than 1 1/2 hours for the event.  There were probably between 350 and 400 youth in attendance.  The nets are removed from 4 courts, leaving 4 courts remaining for sand volleyball.  There are corn hole games (an Indiana game I've learned about since moving here--a bean bag toss sort of game) in the grassy areas, and plenty of space for playing in the sand, along with plenty of room for dancing.  The dance was Saturday night, at the end of Phase 1 of treatments, so my blood counts and energy were close to the lowest level of all of chemo (the lowest was 6 days earlier).  I rested most of the morning to save up energy for the evening.  We were the dance hosts, and I was blessed with a huge extra dose of energy that I know was not of my own doing.  I was able to be on my feet for the 3 hour dance, visit with youth, group dance with my camp girls, re-stock refreshments, and dance a few dances with my wonderful husband (who was our full time water-boy, constantly refilling four 5 gallon containers with lemonade, fruit punch, and water during the entire night).  We are blessed from above when we give our all (even when our all is small) to serve others.  I'm again reminded of a phrase that has become one of my favorites:  "Grace shall be, as your day."  I know that we are given the extra power that we need from our Savior as we do our best to be instruments in His hands.  My dad left us with some advice that he lived by:  "You're wasting the Lord's time, and you're wasting your time if you don't do something every day to serve someone else."  I'm so thankful for his example.  I'm thankful that through this cancer adventure I've been blessed with needed energy to serve when I'm able to and/or when I need to.  I'm also thankful for all of the wonderful examples I'm surrounded by.  I'm thankful for my Savior and the enabling power he gives us through his atonement and his constant watchful care over us.

Back to School & Phase II

I’m thrilled to report that Phase I of this fight is behind us!!  I wasn’t as worn down at the end of round 4 of chemo as I’d expected.  The fatigue gradually increased, but not as severely as I had anticipated.  We met with another surgeon to learn more about our options and now have our plan in place.  A week from today, Monday, August 13, I’ll start Phase 2 of this adventure, 12 rounds of Taxol, given every Monday, ending October 29^th.  Scott can drive and work from the room.  Following Taxol, we wait 3 weeks, and then start Phase 3--surgery, probably on the Monday before Thanksgiving.  Surgery will consist of a lumpectomy (removing what remains of the shrunken cancer and enough surrounding tissue for clear margins), as well as removal of the lymph nodes associated with it.  They say recovery will be from 10-14 days.  My mom is coming into town for surgery, Thanksgiving, and recovery.  Three to four weeks after surgery, I’ll start Phase 4--radiation, 5 days a week for 6 weeks.   I’ll have family in town to help throughout the holiday treatments.  After that, team Fishers 1^st ward (my local church congregation) will step in to help with rides and other needs.  Phase 5 consists of drugs taken for several years into the future, which will block the hormones that feed my type of cancer. 

Looking at the entire process, it is still a bit over-whelming to see how much is still ahead, but taking one day at a time works really well.  The previous 12 weeks flew by.    

It’s been an amazing summer.  I feel so blessed to have enjoyed most of the things I’d looked forward to this summer.  The only big things I missed were two weddings—Jared’s in Texas, and Brett’s in Louisiana, due to plane trips and the risk of germ exposure.   Our family reunion, youth conference, girls camp, and the Color Run were events that provided a lot of memories. 

The Color Run was July 28^th in downtown Indy.  The Indy Star said there were about 10 thousand runners.  Maybe not the best germ avoidance location, but it was out-doors, and the crowd dispersed quickly as the race started.  Garrett drove 10 hours to join us for the race.  It was so fun having him for the weekend.  For the race, runners wear white clothing.  At each “K” of the 5K race, volunteers douse runners with a different powdered color.  At the end, runners are covered with 5 different colors.  At the finishing area, there’s a big field, and every 10 minutes or so, they have a count-down where everyone throws their packets of color, adding more color to the rainbows runners are already wearing.  It was a wholesome, family friendly event.  There were lots of strollers and wagons, kids of all ages with their parents, and even more young, fun, high school and college age kids (including some trapped in older bodies like me!).  It was a fun morning.

The summer is winding down.  Kirsten & Weston are returning to school today.  Heath leaves for school at the end of this month.  Scott Jr. starts classes on the 21st, and Courtney starts her sophomore year of high school on the 15^th.  My special forces team is shrinking!  It was such a blessing having a house full this summer.  Everyone has helped keep the house clean and the laundry running.  Besides preparing wonderful meals, Kirsten took on the role of personal trainer.  Every weekday morning at 6:45, she was ready to drag me on a run.  During TV commercials, she’d say, “On your feet everyone!” and lead us through some type of exercise during the break.  Commercials will never be the same at our house!  Courtney planted a garden and has kept us provided with tomatoes, sweet basil, carrots, and a few other herbs and vegetables.  Heath is our home organization pro—cleaning out the garage, the cubbies, and the pantry.  These areas have never looked better!  Scott Jr. has been our full time landscape manager.  He’s kept the flowerbeds weed free, the bushes nicely trimmed, and the grass mowed.  It’s been wonderful having 3 extra drivers!  They’ve been great!  I’ve only been to the grocery store probably 3 times this entire summer!        

I’m so thankful for my Savior and His loving, watchful care.  I’ve experienced miracles that have allowed me to participate in things that were important to me.  Two different times I started to come down with a fever that would have prevented my participation in events, and both times I was blessed with the fever entirely disappearing.  Many prayers and pleadings have been answered.  My heart is full of gratitude for the loving watchful care of my Savior and for the kind, loving words of support and encouragement from so many friends and family members.  Thank you for being a part of this journey!