The Plan

The quick update:  chemo starts tomorrow!  

We met with our oncologist Tuesday morning.  It has taken a few days of adjusting to the news before I could post this publicly.  My cancer is a recurrence of breast cancer, in a different, yet nearby area, which makes it Stage 4.  This round it is triple negative breast cancer TNBC, which has less options for treatment.  It is inoperable because the masses are spread out and infiltrating the surrounding tissue.  The hard and sobering news, that was especially hard to share with our kids, is that the average life expectancy with this diagnosis is 2 years.  We are hopeful that chemo will shrink the tumors and hopefully ease the nerve pain in my left hand, or at least stop further progression if the nerve damage is permanent.  (Please appreciate that every a and s has to be stroked with my pointer finger!) I appreciated knowing the reality of what I'm up against, but also know that I'm not your average cancer patient.  I have hundreds of prayer warriors out there (thank you everyone), a great support network, and the most compassionate, kind and loving primary care giver anyone could have (he's been the love of my life since I was 14!)  I'm expecting a lot more than 2 years, but planning to live as if I have less than 2 years--making careful and wise decisions about my priorities, and hoping to fight through feeling badly to not miss any important moments.  

We have been blessed with some great news.  My cancer tissue was tested for PD-L1 and it was positive, so I can add in immunotherapy, which is a huge plus.  I've heard of people living many extra years due to this treatment, so that is really encouraging!  

Also, our Bishop and his wife came by for a visit last night, prayed with us and for us, and asked permission to invite our church family to fast for my family this Sunday.  On the first Sunday of the month we always skip 2 meals and go without water and give the money we would have spent on those meals (or more) to help those in need.  We fast with a purpose, and pray for that purpose and focus on that, so when you get hungry, we instead think about God and the blessings he has given us, and think about the person or purpose of our fast.  So I feel so humbled and blessed to have a church family to support my family in such a beautiful, sacred way.  All of your prayers are strongly felt.  I'm feeling very positive and optimistic, and also very composed.  I have only cried a few healthy times.  Reading this diagnosis warrants a negative reaction, but I feel surrounded by strength, love, and optimism.  It's going to be a beautiful journey!  

Beautiful winter sunset that brought me joy.